Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Toppled by a Wave I know you all will enjoy the fact that I was toppled by a wave....twice....while playing on the beach today. Earrings and all got soaking wet....while Barry and Laurie got a big laugh at my expense! What a way to close the day as the sun starting slowly dropping to the horizon. Before that, we took a fun trip all around the island with Sandy and Heather. At one point the guys were so concerned for their "windblown hair look" that they could hardly pose for their picture. (Just imagine Barry laughing the same way a few hours later as he witnessed the ocean taking control over me.)

Life is like that alot of the time: something seems to take control over your feelings so strongly that you believe those feelings are the truth. The feelings often for me are those of hurt, misunderstood, intimidated, misrepresented. Spiraling off them come the lies attached: "They don't think well of me"; "What will she/he think of me now?"; "I am always misunderstood".
As long as I continue in that line of thinking my natural response is usually to run away, go silent, withdraw....and/or to defend myself, justify, over-explain and attack back. My feelings have toppled me out of control much like the waves washing over me and causing me to fall on all fours. When I choose to stay instead of run; pray for clarity instead of attack; continue to engage in community rather than escape into silence and quietly be willing to be misunderstood, a miracle has occurred. I have walked in the Spirit instead of reacting in the flesh. The waves may come....circumstances beyond my control....but I have the power of the gospel available to me to rely on. I did pretty good this time. Father, help me tomorrow.

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